Christine - 12/10/2007
Dear UBM, thank you for your ministry. I have grown so much listening to David. I wanted to share a testimony. I was walking with the Lord for a couple of years and had seen many miracles, healings and answers to prayer in my life.
I was attacked by the enemy less than two years ago and did not see it coming. I made a mistake, thinking the Lord was speaking directly to me through scripture, giving me divine prophecy about my life. (I was afraid to doubt that it wasn't the Lord and wasn't strong enough to know that I need to seek many signs to make sure it is the Lord).
I didn't seek confirmations from the Lord that I should have been seeking and was not being led by the Holy Spirit but was attacked by the spirit of paranoia. I thought the Lord was showing me to flee from my husband with our two-year-old because he was going to kill me. This spirit took me over and made me do some really horrific things. I left the state, listening to a voice in my head. This voice was 50% accurate. I was predicting things as they were happening or about to happen. To make a long story short, I listened to the voice which led me to Massachusetts from Long Island, NY among many other horrific endeavors. I ended up in a mental hospital for almost two weeks.
I was also attacked with the spirit of depression. Before this episode I believed God would meet all my needs and I didn't believe we needed doctors. Now I was on antidepressant medication. I sought healing and prayer many times and did not obtain it. I did have faith in healing and didn't have unforgiveness in my heart. I went to a healing service and was healed of two of the three things for which I was there. The one healing I didn't receive was for the depression. I did feel the spirit of fear leave me immediately (that was one of the healings).
For 15 months I was dependent on this medication. I was driving one day in the car and was listening to a minister on the radio on May 17, 2007. The minister was preaching about being attacked by the enemy and about not having to have done anything wrong to be attacked and "you are healed of your depression".
At first I was apprehensive to believe God was healing me through this minister. I was healed of other things during this 15 months but for some reason the depression was the only thing that never left. If I missed even an hour of taking the pill I would feel the horrific effects of the depression. I felt in my heart to stop taking the medication. I asked the Lord if this was His will to not let me have one side effect of stopping the medication. (I had stopped once before when I found out I was pregnant during this ordeal -- and the withdrawals were horrific).
The next morning I trusted the Lord completely and didn't take my medication. An hour later I was fine. I felt such a peace in my heart that was so strong which stayed with me for the next couple of days. I had no withdrawals and I have been fine to this day. Praise God!
I don't know why I wasn't healed earlier. I don't know why I was attacked. I praise God that through the past two years I have been beaten down but not destroyed. I am stronger than ever in the Lord. My faith is stronger than ever. During the past two years people tried to make me stop believing in the miracles of God. It was amazing how everyone was ok if I went to church or say that I believe in God but when it came down to believing in healings or answered prayer, both some Christians and non-Christians thought I was wrong.
If I testify of my healings, present or past, the enemy attacks me by having others tell me I'm mentally ill. I wonder if that is why I was attacked in the first place because the year before I was testifying of all the healings and miracles God had done both in me and my two-year-old.
I am so thankful to God that He sent His only Son to die on a cross for me to have forgiveness and healing. There is no greater love. I love my God so much.